Deep Conversation Topics – A List of Helpful Suggestions

Deep conversations can help us grow and develop more meaningful relationships.  There are many topics to choose from, and the only challenge is usually who will you choose to participate in a deep conversation with?

Meaningful relationships can be grown and developed through deep conversations.  These interactions have many benefits from sharing experiences to increased understanding of each other and the world around us.  From coworkers to family members, deep conversations are opportunities to learn and grow.

What does a deep conversation mean to you?  Who have you had a deep conversation with, and what did it mean to you? Let’s explore.

What Are Deep Conversation Topics?

Deep conversation topics are those you discuss with someone who means something to you.  These topics are very important, have great effects on you or others, and may even have global implications.  There’s great purpose to these conversations, including sharing concerns or ideas, feelings or fears, and discussing current as well as past events and how they have affected society.

Deep conversation topics can be unique to the individual but may include discussions about:

1. Personal goals and values
2. Meaning of life
3. Human nature
4. Morals and beliefs
5. Technology
6. Art
7. Literature

What Is a Deep Conversation?

A deep conversation is one that is shared with another party, usually someone you know pretty well.  During a deep conversation there are well thought out questions and answers, thoughts and ideas, and responses to what is shared beyond “yes” or “no”.  There’s open sharing of information and personal responses without fear of recourse, judgement, or shame.

Benefits of Deep Conversation Topics

Positive and meaningful relationships are created and reinforced through deep conversations.  There are several benefits to these conversations:

• Sharing of thoughts, feelings, ideas
• Discussion of pain and sorrow
• Shared experiences
• (Possible) Resolution of anger, fear, disappointment, etc.
• Clarity of current or past situation(s)
• Greater understanding
• Deeper relationships

These benefits may not come with every deep conversation, it depends on who you’re having these types of conversations with.  Whether it’s your spouse or partner or a close friend, these are conversations that are very meaningful and beneficial for both parties.  Now let’s take a look at what these conversations might look like.

Interesting Deep Conversation Topics

There are many topics of conversation that can be thought of as deep, and of course this depends on who is involved and where you’re at (physically as well as emotionally).  There’s probably even some deep conversation topics you wouldn’t want to discuss with some parties.  Let’s review some categories of people and topics to help you have a deep conversation.

Deep Conversation Questions

• What are your life goals?
• Where do you see yourself in 5 years?  10 years?  20 years?
• Who are you, deep down?  Who do you want to be?
• What’s the greatest thing that’s ever happened to you?  What’s the worst?
• If you knew you were going to die tomorrow, how would you live today?
• Where do you find peace?

Deep Conversation Topics With Boyfriend

• Who’s the most important person in your life?
• How many meaningful relationships have you been involved in?
• Have you ever hurt someone emotionally?  What happened?
• What do you want to do with your life?
• Where do you see us in a year?
• What makes you smile or feel good?
• Who would you die for?

In a deep conversation […] there’s open sharing of information and personal responses without fear of recourse, judgement, or shame.

Deep Conversation Topics With Girlfriend

• What’s the most meaningful thing a partner has done for you?
• What do you like most about yourself?  What do you dislike?
• What would you change about yourself and why?
• Where do you see us in a year?
• What life lesson(s) did you learn from your parent(s)?

Deep Conversation Topics With Friends

• What drew you to me as a friend?
• Where do we have differing opinions and why?
• What do we have in common and how can we capitalize on that?
• If you had the opportunity to do a good deed and didn’t, what was it and why didn’t you?
• What would you change about society today?

Deep Conversation Topics With Family

• What were your childhood experiences like?
• How did you see your life when you were a child?
• What goals did you set for yourself as a child, and how did you meet them?  Did you meet them or change them?
• How does the world today compare to your world as a child?
• What are your wishes for end-of-life care?

Deep Conversation Topics for Couples

• What are our goals in life?
• Do we want children or not and why?
• Where do we want to live and potentially raise children and why?
• Marriage or lifelong relationship?
• What is something you fight for?

Deep Conversation Topics for Business

• What brought you to where you are today in your career?
• What career goals do you have and why?
• Where do you see yourself in 5 years?  10 years?
• How would your closest friends describe you?
• Tell me about a time you felt like quitting.
• What does “success” mean to you?

Deep Conversation Topics for Dating

• What are your life goals?
• What’s the most meaningful relationship you’ve had?
• If you had a day to experience again, what would it be and why?
• Where do you see yourself in a year?
• How would your closest friends and family describe you?

And this is only a fraction of deep conversation topics!  Which one(s) will you use?

How Do You Start a Deep Conversation?

Not every time and place is appropriate for a deep conversation, so make sure you set the stage appropriately.  Also make sure you’ve got the time and the other party is not only available-but willing to participate in a deep conversation.  Here are some criteria to help you start a deep conversation with someone:

1. Who are you going to be dialoging with?  Make sure you’ve got their attention and the time.
2. Set boundaries and guidelines if necessary-ensure that if someone is uncomfortable with a topic or an answer that they are safely able to communicate this.
3. Remove any distractions-smartphone, laptop, pets, children, etc.
4. Get and maintain eye contact as much as is comfortable.
5. Avoid fidgeting and looking away, and monitor the other party for these non-verbal communication signs.
6. Speak clearly and openly.
7. Be sure to actively listen and demonstrate this by paraphrasing their answers-this will help confirm understanding both ways.
8. Set a time limit if needed-some deep conversations can continue for a long period of time, and if you or they don’t have the time to finish the conversation this should be addressed up front.

If you follow these steps, this will make it a little easier to have that deep conversation. 

Here is an informative video on how to hold a deep conversation.

Why People Like Deep Conversations

Deep conversations are preferred by some people because they carry so much more meaning than the typical day-to-day conversations.  There’s so much opportunity to learn more about others, experience more feelings, share more feelings and experiences, and grow deeper relationships.  These meaningful relationships give us something (and someone!) to look forward to and add substance to our day.  This can also lead to less stress, more happiness, and more opportunity for growth.

Examples of Conversation Topics – From Real People

I asked 5 family and/or friends what top 4 deep conversation topics they enjoy or would like to have. Here is what I learned from the poll, and what they shared.

Other Resources:

• Meaningful Conversation – Guide to Deeper Conversations

Deep conversations allow us to learn more about each other and how we interpret thoughts as well as the world around us.  As long as we take into consideration who we’re talking with, generational differences, and the nature of our relationships we can have meaningful interactions that grow us professionally or personally.  Deep conversations can make relationships more meaningful and even change someone’s perspective.

Related Topics

Meaningful Conversations: Friendships and relationships are maintained with meaningful conversations.  Benefits of these include growth, understanding, and stronger bonds.  Meaningful conversations are opportunities to learn about each other.

Authenticity: Authenticity is saying something and demonstrating the same thing-being true to your morals and values.  Even when facing adversity and conflict, we use strength of character to practice authenticity.